Lots of people told us things would change for Oscar when Annabelle came along. They said we wouldn't spend as much time with him. They said he'd get in the way. They said he'd be the second, forgotten child.Alas, 10 months later, these people were right.
It's hard to admit when people are right. (Especially when those people are your parents.) Faced with a new situation, it's human nature to say, "No, not me. Sure, that might have happened to you, but I'm different." And sometimes we are different. Mostly, though, we aren't.
Think about all the examples, all the things people (and movies) have said to you that have turned out to be true even though they seemed crazy at the time:
- "I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was 12. Jesus, does anyone?" Sure, Stand By Me, whatever. You don't know what you're talking about.
- "The popular kids in high school are not as cool as you think they are." But, Mom, you don't understand. I need sit to sit at that lunch table.
- "It's important to stretch before you work out. You'll feel it as you start to get older." Older? Who's going to get older?
- "Going to bars will get old." Whatever, 25-year-old friend. It's just because you don't know how to enjoy yourself.
- "You'll miss college when you're gone." Um, no, I won't. I'm totally over this place.
- "You'll be annoyed with your new job in a month." Uh-uh. No way. Not this job. This job is always going to be new, exciting, and awesome.
- "You might not want that last beer …" Psssh. I'm fine. This is the greatest night of my life!
- "That meeting with all the important people at work isn't as cool as you think it is." Yeah, right. You're just saying that. I need to climb this corporate ladder and make all the decisions!
The list could go on and on. You'll probably think of two or three more by the time you finish reading this sentence. And sadly, "You'll forget about your dog after you have a baby" is on that list for us.
I had a crystallizing moment on Friday when this truth became terribly apparent. It was the end of the day and I was juggling a bag of trash, a bag of laundry, and a 10-month old. Oscar followed us downstairs (as he always does) and watched as I put the trash outside. I went back inside to put the laundry in the washing machine and then came back upstairs with Annabelle in my arms and a smile on my face. I felt productive and efficient. And I thought to myself as I checked my work email one last time, Man, I'm pretty good at multi-tasking. And I'm getting pretty good at this Dad stuff. I mean --
Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!
What the heck? Where in the world is --
Barrrrrk! Barrrrrk! Barrrrrk!
Oscar was still outside. I had forgotten about him. What a terrible Dog Dad.
To make up for it, this morning, I spent some extra time with him. We walked slowly to the dog park. I threw tennis ball after tennis ball until he looked like he was done, not the other way around. He drank lots of water, smiled, and fell asleep under a shady maple tree. He was happy.
So yes, people are often going to be right when they say things from experience. We're all similar creatures. But it doesn't mean you can't prove them wrong every once in a while. Sometimes you make even better friends later in life. Sometimes it's still cool to go to bars. Sometimes a new job stays exciting for years. And sometimes you just need to slow down and watch your dog run in the park:
