Why I'm Choosing a Word Instead of Making a Resolution

Oscar and I haven't always been buddies. In fact, when we first met, relations were downright icy. I didn't really like dogs and he didn't really like some dude getting lots of Bridget's attention.

But in April of 2011, we became best friends. That spring, after about a year of dating, Bridget went to Australia and Fiji for two weeks, which meant I was responsible for Oscar. I had to walk him, feed him, and pick up his poop. I called it my Oscar immersion.

Fast forward 2.5 years and I just had the same experience with Annabelle. Sure, I'd changed diapers, fed her, and generally learned how to be a Dad from September 4 - December 23, but when Bridget went back to work that Monday morning, all baby eyes were on me. For the last two weeks, from 9-5, I had to do it all myself. (Well, mostly myself; I had help with milk production.) My sole purpose in life was making Annabelle smile more than she cried.

Now, Annabelle is officially turning into a daddy's girl. These two weeks changed everything. I know I can take care of my daughter on my own. I've successfully completed my Annabelle immersion.

As I thought about these two experiences, that one word stuck in my head: immersion. It's going to guide me in 2014.

Back in April of 2011, I had some fears about the whole Oscar experience. I'd never cared for a dog on my own and had this image in my mind of Oscar ripping off a small child's leg at Fresh Pond while I watched in horror. Dog catchers. Paramedics. Lawsuits. Blood everywhere. That, of course, didn't happen. (In fact, Oscar's most aggressive move is barking at the doorbell.)

A couple weeks ago, going into the Annabelle experience, I had the same fears -- not of her ripping off a child's leg, but of me doing something horribly wrong. Broken bones. Hours of crying. Poop on the ceiling. And all of that, again, of course, didn't happen. (She did pee on me several times, but that's cool.)

I realize, in hindsight, that the fears were unfounded. But it took really dedicating myself to something to know for sure. The Oscar and Annabelle immersions both gave me a newfound confidence that changed the way I interacted with both of them.

So why not get immersed in more things in 2014? Instead of making a resolution that I'll undoubtedly ignore in a month, I'm going to try to change my mindset. Think about it: Will I really stop eating ice cream at night? (Not likely.) Will I really go running four times a week? (Doubt it.) Will I really learn how to play the guitar? (No.)

That doesn't mean I won't have goals or strive for success; it just means I'm going to try to take a deep dive into what I'm doing and be more present. Right now, I'm one of those people who is always thinking about my next step. If I'm at the gym, I'm thinking about the groceries I need. If I'm walking to work, I'm thinking about that project I need to finish. If I'm reading a book, I'm thinking about the next one on my list. Instead, I should be thinking about my body's response to the exercise, my foot against the pavement, and the words on the page.

I hope to apply this idea of immersion to everything this year -- new skills, new books, and new ideas. Will it be challenging? Yes. But it seems like a great place to put my energy for the next 12 months. Plus, there's no way I'm giving up ice cream.